


Look At You

by zadonis



Category: Carry On - Rainbow Rowell, One Direction (Band)
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Pining, it's a carry on au sort of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-10
Updated: 2016-02-10
Packaged: 2018-05-19 08:09:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,501
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5960233
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zadonis/pseuds/zadonis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Zayn and Liam are in the most famous band in the world, but they're also mages from Watford School of Magicks. As they grow in the band, Zayn decides to try his hand at creating spells out of songtitles, and if you were to ask Liam, he'd probably say Zayn was a success.</p>
<p>(insp by Héla, aka vastlyunknown because one time she was talking about carry on, and that got this whole thing started)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Look At You

The funny thing was that neither of them had known each other while they were at the Watford School of Magicks. Zayn Malik and Liam Payne had run parallel to each other that whole time - just two lads in the world of mages, studying old languages and new ones to create marvelous spells; just two mages who decided to leave Watford after their sixth year and try out for the Normal show The X-Factor.

Even once they’d been put together in a band with the three other lads, neither of them realized that the other was a mage. They each just assumed that the other four were Normals. 

Until they realized they were wrong, of course.

Zayn was the first to realize he wasn’t alone. All those long months in the Contestant’s House, he’d been so careful to not use his magic, not wanting to be seen as a freak by his bandmates or anyone else. But it was Liam who gave himself away first shortly after they’d left the show and were on the X-Factor tour.

Backstage before a performance, Louis and Liam had just gotten in an argument where Louis had lied to the younger boy. Just as Louis was walking away from where Liam stood frowning, Zayn noticed Liam’s hand twitch as he muttered “ _Liar Liar pants on fire!”_ Before they’d even stepped on stage five minutes later, Louis was complaining about the unscratchable burning itch on his bum.

Zayn had considered that it was possibly a coincidence, but when Niall was having a near panic attack as they squeezed through a crowd a few days later, Zayn heard Liam (who was pressed tightly behind him) whispering “ _Hakuna Matata”_ and Niall calmed down almost instantly despite still being pushed and shoved and squeezed by the throng of people. 

He could’ve confronted his bandmate then and there, but he didn’t. Zayn kept his knowledge of Liam’s secret, and his own magic, to himself.

Liam finally caught on to Zayn’s non-Normalness after an oddly quick trip from London to Los Angeles (so maybe Zayn had used a _Time Flies,_ but they’d all had fun, hadn’t they?), and after he successfully distracted Paul from them sneaking out by using “ _These aren’t the droids you’re looking for.”_  

He didn’t keep his knowledge a secret. No, Liam cornered Zayn as soon as possible.

“You’re not Normal!” He 

“Well, that’s rude, Liam,” Zayn wiggled, trying to break free of Liam’s tight hold.

Liam frowned, “You know what I mean, Zayn. You’re -” He glanced around to make sure it was all clear. “You’re a _mage._ So am I.”

There was no point in pretending anymore, so Zayn agreed. And after that it was all much easier. They could both use magic whenever they needed, just as long as it was never too obvious. They shared ideas for spells, taught each other new ones, and learned the taste of their bandmate’s magic.

Zayn quickly learned that Liam’s magic smelled like a rain-dampened forest, and he used a stereotypical wand for magic. Even before Liam knew about Zayn’s mage-ness, he’d noticed that on the odd occasion, Zayn would smell like smoke - even before he took up smoking. 

“My ring is my conduit,” Zayn confided to Liam one evening, adjusting the thick silver ring on his middle left finger. “It’s a bit of an odd one, my sisters say, but it works to be inauspicious.” 

As the years passed by (dragging in some places, speeding by in others like a faulty _Time Flies_ ) the two boys grew closer, grew more comfortable.

Over time Liam realized that Zayn was fantastic at creating spells on the spot. The way he used his words, manipulating them into spells to make himself invisible when the fans came too close when he was out in public, manipulating them into spells that would let him see his family even when he was on the other side of the earth.

It was no big surprise when he came up with the perfect one (which honestly should’ve been created long before) in mid-2014.  

They were in the middle of tour. It was the middle of the night. Zayn was laying in bed, restless due to jetlag, and mulling over spells in his mind. The clock on the bedside table was blinking a bright red 3:27am at him, so it was perfectly acceptable that he nearly jumped out of his skin when a knock sounded at his door.

No sooner had Zayn reached the door than Liam was stumbling inside, clearly drunk. “Zayn, mate. Zee, babe, can I talk to you?” Liam placed a heavy hand on Zayn’s shoulder, using him as support back across the room to the bed.

“Sure, Liam. What do you want to talk about?”

Liam fell down on the bed and looked up at Zayn, his bottom lip pouting out and his eyes growing wider. “I was on Twitter just now and the fans were saying stuff -”

They’d told him dozens of times it was a bad idea to get on Twitter while drinking (or while being drunk). Zayn sat down on the mattress, “Li, we’ve told you not....”

“Yeah, yeah. I know. But I couldn’t help it. And then they were saying such mean things. Not just about me, but, you know, mostly about me.” He sniffled and turned his face away. “I’m fat, didn’t you know? Like, I know I’ve been skipping more gym sessions with Mark than I should, and I’ve been eating more.”

“You’re not fat, Liam.” Zayn reached over to rub Liam’s back, but Liam jerked away.

He shook his head. “I am. I know I am. It’s just that they’re being mean about it. Really mean.” He sniffled again and rubbed at his eyes. “Now look at me I’m a fat crybaby.”

“No, you’re drunk, Liam.” Zayn stood up. “You’re not fat at all. Do I need to prove it to you?”

“How’re you gonna do that?” Liam hiccuped, and watched as Zayn walked over to his suitcase. The older boy spent a few moments rummaging around in his clothes before he withdrew his heavy silver ring. “A spell? Zee, I don’t think there’s any spell -”

Zayn held up a hand and slid the ring on. “Shut up, Li. I made it. Quite simple, really. Come on,” He reached a hand out for Liam to take. “I’ve got to show this to you.”

Liam accepted his hand and let him pull him over to a tall mirror hung against a wall in the room. 

“Stand here.” Zayn said, placing Liam a few feet directly in front of the mirror. He stood behind him, hands on his hips, chin resting on his shoulder. “Do you see yourself in the mirror, babe? You’re not fat at all.” He reached a hand up to pat Liam’s cheeks. Sure they were a bit fuller than they had been a few months ago, but so were everyone’s on tour. Sarah’s Kitchen spoiled them rotten. His other hand went to Liam’s belly.

The younger of the two blushed, “What-?”

“Shh.” He lifted the bottom hem of Liam’s shirt up, tugging it up until it had come off entirely. “No fat, see. Look at you.” Liam’s tummy was on display, his chest and shoulders, too. He was beautiful. Zayn smiled at their reflection. “Do you see now?” He looked up to Liam’s face.

“No,” Liam’s eyes were focused on his own face. He frowned and looked down to his abdominal area where Zayn still had his hands resting on Liam’s hips. “Can you not see how fat I am?” He attempted to turn around in Zayn’s arms. “Why did you make me come over here?”

Zayn kept Liam facing the mirror, “To show you that you’re not fat. To show you  _What makes you beautiful!”_ He twisted the ring around his finger three times. And then a fourth for good measure.

Their image in the mirror shimmered, and when it cleared so did Liam’s frown. In fact, his lips turned up in a smile. “How’d you go that? What did you do?” 

Zayn couldn’t see any difference at all in their reflection, but obviously Liam could. 

“What do you see?” Zayn prompted.

“I’m fit.” Liam laughed, “What does the spell do? I can’t believe you used one of our songs!” He stepped closer to the mirror, watching his own reflection as he ran a hand over his cheeks, over his cute belly and chest. He looked back over his shoulder, catching Zayn watching him.

Zayn didn’t know how to tell him that the spell made Liam see himself as Zayn saw him. Through Zayn’s eyes, Liam was fit as hell, a somewhat recent revelation to the elder of the two. It had only been within the last few months that Zayn had realized “Holy fuck I think I like Liam.”

“Zee?” Liam turned around, reaching for Zayn’s arm. “What’s the spell do?”

“Makes you see you through my eyes.” Zayn said, glancing away, back towards the bed. He wanted nothing more than to dive into it, hide under the covers and never resurface. He wasn’t sure, but it was unlikely that Liam felt the same way about him.

Liam laughed again, “Thank you! And that spell is genius, mate.” He wrapped Zayn in a hug, twirling and spinning him around all the way back over to the bed. “Thank you.”

A minute and a half later, Liam was passed out, snoring on the other half of Zayn’s bed, a silly grin still plastered on his face. 

A few more months passed by. Liam put off the small bit of extra weight he’d gained, but he still occasionally asked Zayn to cast a _What makes you beautiful_ , and he claimed it was because he liked how it made him feel afterwards. 

“It’s like a feel-good hangover,” he’d explained one day. “I feel all warm and fuzzy inside.”

 Zayn had gone warm and hidden away for a few hours after that because that feeling was a lot like love. And love was exactly what he felt towards Liam. He knew that now. He knew that the warm tingles, the absolute sunbeam of a smile he couldn’t help but display around him, the need to create spells that would make Liam happier - those were all signs that he loved him, he was _in love_  with him.

But to Zayn’s knowledge, Liam didn’t feel the same. 

Liam still dated girls, fucked them, talked about them, and it hurt Zayn to be witness to all of it. But he did. He suffered through it and continued to put on the happy face with a spells like a very carefully crafted _If You’re Happy and You Know It_ which was miraculously a very sarcastic spell. 

Then came the day, a few shows into the On the Road Again tour, when they were at rehearsals. Liam broke the news.

“I’m single again.” He said the words cavalierly, tucking his phone back into his pocket, and glancing up to meet Zayn’s gaze. “Soph’s been in a real bad mood lately. Calling it off and then telling me she was wrong, and then all over again.” He rolled his eyes. “This time I’m not taking her back.”

Zayn felt like his heart was about to burst out of his chest. “What?”

“Yeah. We’re through.” Liam nodded. “I haven’t been really into her lately. Like, at all.” He shrugged, biting his lip. Zayn couldn’t believe Liam - the boy with hearts for eyes - was being so chill about the end of a long-term relationship. Not that Zayn was really complaining. Single Liam was a good Liam, in his books.

Louis shouted their names. Rehearsal resumed.

More news, this time not so great, hit them just a few hours later, just forty minutes before show time. 

“Niall’s not feeling well.” Harry emerged from the toilets, looking a bit green himself. “He’s puking. What do we do?” 

They’d never cancelled a show before for a sick member, but this was Niall who was the heart and jolly soul of their onstage personas. They could already hear the crowd out in the stadium, the opening act’s performance. Niall peered out of the door a few minutes later looking quite worse for wear. 

“Go on without me. It’ll be fine. You all know my parts, the band can fill in for me on the guitar. It’ll be alright, go.” He waved them all on, then ducked quickly back inside. The sound of being sick followed.

Quickly they divvied up Niall’s song parts among them.

It was in the last spare minutes before going on stage - in the hectic rush of finished outfits, hairspray clouds, and last mic checks - that Liam grabbed Zayn’s arm and pulled him aside, away from where Louis and Harry were ready for their band huddle.

“I really need to talk to you.”

“What? Now?”

Liam shook his head. “Later. Just. Promise me.”

Zayn agreed, squeezing Liam’s arm as they rejoined their other two bandmates in the huddle. 

The stage was loud and hot and bright. Zayn was sweating through his top before the first song had even ended. He could see that Liam was the exact same way: his forehead dripping sweat, his bare arms glistening under the stage lights. 

This concert was such high energy. The fans were insanely loud, pumping all four of them full of the exhilaration they needed to make it the best show possible. Zayn watched as Liam picked up a pair of large pink, plastic sunglasses that someone had thrown on stage, and he put them on, singing the rest of Stockholm Sydrome in them and an odd crocodile hat. 

Every now and then, Liam would wander over to Zayn’s side, breaking choreography just once or twice to do so. Sometimes he would throw an arm around his shoulders, sometimes he would wiggle his eyebrows and sing the song to Zayn as if the words were meant specifically for him. And then there were the times when Liam would find a gift from a fan on the stage, and he would present it to Zayn if it was especially interesting.

By the second half of the concert, Zayn was wearing down. He sat on one of the weird rail ramp things on the catwalk, waving and smiling at fans, when suddenly he felt sweaty hot skin smothering him from behind.

Liam was hanging over him, cheek pressed to cheek, smiles centimeters apart. Zayn’s heart fluttered. 

“Hey, Zayn, are you going to pay attention? We’re about to start the last song. Don’t forget you’ve got Niall’s parts in this one, babe.” If Zayn thought his heart had fluttered before, it must’ve full on stopped for a moment at the skin to skin contact coupled with the term of endearment.

He pulled away so that he could actually look at Liam’s face. Liam was grinning, cheeks pushed up into his crinkled eyes. His hair was a sweaty mess that Zayn just wanted to run his fingers through, cast a quick _Keep this love in a photograph_ spell with just a few twists of his ring.

Instead, Zayn stood up and hurried back up the mainstage to where their microphones were standing, ready for them to sing 18 for the first time live. 

“I got a heart -” Harry started just as Zayn stepped into his spot on the outer right mic. Liam filled his place beside him.

Zayn’s heart throbbed painfully, joyfully in his chest. He could remember hours in a studio, writing this song with Ed (another mage who’d successfully kept his secret, and Zayn’s) and even longer hours recording it, listening to the other boys recording it, and all the while pretending that he hadn’t written it with Liam in mind.

And now he was sharing it, out in public, for the first real time. 

His lines came up, flashing through his mind the vivid image of kissing Liam when they were 18. Back then it had been a joke. Zayn hadn’t been serious with any of his feelings about almost anything, and especially not the ones he felt towards his male bandmate.

Liam glanced back at Zayn, a half smile on his lips while Harry began crooning the chorus. 

Liam was still looking at Zayn when the time came to attempt Niall’s solo. Zayn licked his lips, tilted his mic stand towards the boy he loved, and twisted the silver ring around his finger, as he sang, “We took a chonce...”

The rest of his words trailed off. His world spun until all the colors ran together and it was just Liam that was in focus, still smiling, still gazing at Zayn with that look in his eyes. That look like. Oh.

Around Zayn, the air smelled like smoke, and his fingers tingled with the remnants of magic. Had he just cast a spell? What had he done?

“So pour me a drink.” Liam’s voice shook Zayn back to reality, and the younger of the two didn’t take his eyes off of Zayn. His face and voice were filled with confidence as he belted out, “Oh, love. Let’s split the night wide open!” 

“And we’ll see everything we can living love in slow motion, motion, motion.” Zayn harmonized with him, smiling and sliding his gaze back out to the fans. Several in the front row were just gawking at the two of them. Zayn wanted to laugh.

The song ended soon, and with that, the concert was over as well. As the did their finally jog around stage, waving and bowing and everything, Zayn realized he was absolutely drenched with sweat.

He was glad to run off stage, halfway peeling his shirt off before he was completely backstage. But none of that mattered because as soon as his sweat-soaked top was gone - 

“Zayn!” Liam’s sticky body once against pressed against his back, and this time, Zayn spun around to face him completely. Liam was positively beaming, as he asked, “What spell did you just do? What was that? It was - It was bloody powerful, you wicked, wonderful mage!” 

His hands curled around Zayn’s waist and he twirled him around. This time Zayn didn’t fight his urge to laugh.

“What the hell were those fireworks, Zayn?” Louis sputtered, coming up from behind them, swatting Zayn on the bottom as he passed.

“Huh?” Zayn dropped down to the ground, Liam’s arms releasing him. 

Harry was the one to answer since Louis was already out of sight. “You forgot the lyrics and then you and Liam just stared at each other for thirty seconds. You just gave the fans that think you two are soulmates even more ammo now.” He winked and ran further into the backstage area.

“Soulmates.” Liam laughed, curling his fingers around Zayn’s wrist. “Was that a soulmate spell you did? With our own lyrics?”

“It depends,” Zayn huffed out when Liam lifted his fingertips up to plush pink lips, and pressed a gentle kiss against Zayn’s silver-ring-adorned finger. “What did you get from that spell?”

Liam shook his head, and pulled Zayn with him as he began to walk further backstage. “I felt like the world was spinning so fast, and all that made sense in that chaos was you. You were the only thing that was clear.” He knotted their hands together between them, swinging them up in an arc.

“Funny. It must be a soulmate spell then.” Zayn laughed, feeling like he was about to choke on his heart. _Liam’s my soulmate. He thinks he’s my soulmate; he must  be._

Back in the dressing room the five boys shared, Liam released Zayn’s hand in favor of getting dressed in non-sweaty clothes. Zayn quickly did the same.

“Come back to my bus,” Liam told him, not really giving much choice in the matter. “I still wanna talk to you.”

No sooner had the climbed the stairs into the bus, waved at the driver to let him know that he they were onboard, and walked the few paces down to the lounge area, than Liam was pressing his full body weight against Zayn, sending the slighter of the two tumbling down onto the couch. 

Zayn was pleasantly surprised to find that this kiss was much different from the first one they’d shared years before. Where that one had been innocent and testing, this one was passionate and knowledgeable. They both knew what they wanted now.

“What did you want to talk to me about?” Zayn panted, pressing in closer, touching his lips to the soft underside of Liam’s jaw.

Liam laughed, fingers scrabbling up under Zayn’s top, trying to push it up and off. “Just wanted to tell you,” He kissed Zayn’s chin and cheek and nose. “I love you. Realized it a little while back, but I was with Soph.” Zayn’s shirt disappeared. “Love you. Always have.”

The next words he didn’t have to say, because both Zayn and Liam already knew them:  _Always will._

 

**Author's Note:**

> Just to make it clear the spells are:
> 
> liar liar pants on fire - depending on emphasized word can lead to burning itch or actual fire
> 
> hakuna matata - anti-anxiety spell because, you know, “it means no worries”
> 
> these aren’t the droids you’re looking for - redirection of attention/hiding something
> 
> time flies, aka Time Flies when You’re Having Fun - if you’re having fun, time goes faster
> 
> what makes you beautiful (from wmyb, obviously) - shows the person who’s been cast upon how the caster see’s them
> 
> if you’re happy and you know it - sarcastic because you can be unhappy and it’ll make you smile so other’s think you’re happy
> 
> keep this love in a photograph (photograph - ed sheeran) - saves the moment like a photo in your memory, easier to recall than other old memories
> 
> we took a chance/chonce (from 18, obviously) - (emphasis leads to better effect) will reveal the soulmate of the caster to the caster, and vice versa - side effects: awe that may strike them temporarily dumb


End file.
